YES I CAN! the musical

Yesterday I decided to analyze my excuses and uncover the root of my issues. Today I am going to begin to repair this broken mind. After all, that is the point of my blog.

Let me start with a couple of positive affirmations that I know about myself.

  • I am incredibly resilient. I have been through a lot in my life time and I am not afraid to get my hands dirty. My fears do not stop me from chasing my dreams, they only help me to see what areas that I need to work on.
  • I wake up every day of my life with a brand new perspective. I truly see every day as an opportunity to do every thing that I couldn’t or wouldn’t do yesterday.
  • For every negative thought that goes through my mind, I have two positive thoughts chasing it away.
  • I understand the yin and yang of life. You must go through hardship to understand and appreciate the good times. You can’t have dark without light, good without bad, success without failure.
  • I am honest with myself and very self aware. I can see and admit when I am doing wrong and I can humbly feel the pride when I do something right.
  • I am forever working on my character. “What you do when no one else is watching.”
  • I am one of the most optimistic pessimists I know. I can always find the ray of sun light on the cloudiest of days.
  • I have the ability to become an unmovable mountain when I am challenged to do so. If I set my mind to something, I cannot be stopped.

Well that felt good to express these things. I think its important to stay in touch with your ups and downs. It is healthy to acknowledge when you don’t feel right and celebrate when you do.

So here is what I want to do. I’m going to make a list, a.k.a. “a declaration” of what I am going to do to change my life. And I am aware that I have made many lists and been down many paths. And when that little voice in my head says, why is this list different from the last one, or the one before that you didn’t follow through with? I have to shut it down! I will make a thousand lists and start over a thousand times if that is what it takes to reach my destination. I am not afraid to fail because I know I will not stop…. I’ll only get more determined to make things happen! Besides trying and falling is much better than not trying at all.

  • No drinking as of today July 12th 2018….. accountability to yourself and others is key. Shout it on the rooftop so there is no secrecy about this. It makes it harder to continue the behavior.
  • Daily writing – I will journal/blog to mark my progress as well as share my thoughts along this road. Its important to stay in touch and up to date with what is happening in your mind. It’s a slippery slope when it becomes…. “out of sight, out of mind” and you are more likely to slip back into an old habit.
  • Daily exercise – I might be limited with my heart issues right now, but that can no longer be an excuse. I am determined to lose some weight and feel the best I can. I have yet to determine the type of exercise yet, but I will begin today as well.
  • Daily guitar and singing – I am making progress and I must see this through. I will also record as many sessions as possible to continue to document this process.
  • Make friends: Compliment someone daily – I will find someone in real life and someone online to compliment every day. I believe I can make my life better if I attempt to make someone else’s life better. It seems like a small step, but two people seems doable.
  • Purify my mind – this one is a little more complex. I would like to stop swearing because I don’t think it adds anything to the person I want to be. I also want to stay away from visuals or audio that might distract me from my goals, such as graphic movies or comedians. I’d like to be more aware of the music I listen to and the message its sending me. I believe that my ultimate goals and transformation require me to have an uncluttered mind and a pure heart. I don’t think I need the media to influence my grand vision.
  • Healthy eating – I have no doubt this is a big challenge right now for me. I would like to stop the fast food and learn to cook more. I would like to eat more vegetarian, although I don’t have to go completely that direction. I would like to drink more water and tea as well.

These are few of things I am going to attempt for the next year until the summer solstice comes back around. Yes it is a tall order and there is plenty of room to fail. I think my biggest challenge is to keep these goals in the forefront of my mind as a reminder. I forget really easily and get distracted. I imagine I will have to reread this daily if not more often to stay on track.

Its also interesting when you declare these type of goals, how many people will let you know how hard that will be and how they would not want to do that. I think people feel guilty that they don’t have the strength to change. So they convince themselves they wouldn’t want to. But honestly none of that makes any difference. I am basically talking to myself. I have to stay strong and true to myself, even if I find myself walking this particular road alone. But having said that, I would love the company.

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